I can't believe how difficult it is to write this post. I've struggled several times with what to say, what not to say and just haven't been able to type out the words to begin.
I began running two years ago as an attempt to begin a healthier lifestyle, but just as important, it was an attempt to start a new hobby for me ... an attempt to succeed at something by not procrastinating or being lazy. So far, it's been a mixture of successes and failures, much like life in general.
I've completed 5k's, a ten miler and a half-marathon. Completed the distances, that is, but have not successfully completed the training plans. And with a disappointing half back in March, I took a huge break from running. Yes, I was extremely proud of myself at first for completing the 13.1 miles on an incredibly muddy course (amazing what an entire week of rain will do to a trail), but I started beating myself up shortly afterward for not completing the training plan's midweek runs. I did a pretty good job at the weekend long runs, but I found it difficult to get in the shorter distance runs during the week. The more I thought about it, the more I convinced myself I screwed up and the downward spiral began.
So here it is, almost five months later and time to begin training for the Medoc 10-miler again. And ... I slept in yesterday and today and still haven't done the first weekly run, a measly 2 miles. My weight has crept up again and reaching 150 pounds seems like an impossibility. I'm eating way too much crap. It'll take a miracle to reach 500 miles for the year.
But still, somewhere inside me, there's a part that thinks I can achieve big things in running. Big things, like 26.2 miles in March 2011. But it'll take discipline and determination to complete a training plan during the winter. Can I do it? Jeff Galloway says I can, if I follow his plan. There's even a podcast providing inspiration.
For now, though, it's baby steps again ... but at least that's moving forward.
I like your analogy of running to life - a mixture of successes and failures. How true!
ReplyDeleteI recommend two possible things for you. Consider a training plan that requires fewer days/week of training. I have trained 3 days/week for the past two marathons I've run, and am actually running faster times than when I ran more often. You might not be as disappointed in yourself this way. Also, try to find a running group. Believe me, when I meet my running partner, I am FAR more likely to get up when the alarm rings.
Good luck!
You're back! I know it's SO DIFFICULT to get out there, especially if it's been a while. It took me from February to about...last month (?) to feel like I finally have a routine that makes it easier to motivate myself to get moving. Definitely check out the training plans on Runnersworld.com. They have you running 3 days/week + cross-training. I find it much more realistic and I think you can still have good results.
ReplyDeleteFor the cross-training, I do a LOT of walking with the baby jogger (resistance training?), some biking, and am now trying to incorporate some exercise DVDs because they're probably the easiest way to squeeze 20-30 min of exercise into a day when you're already busy w/ house chores, child care, etc.
Keep the faith! You can do it!
Missed you. I agree with Melinda to find a training plan with 3 or 4 days a week of running. I ran a marathon with 4 days a week of training. And you miss a run, try not to be so hard on yourself. Focus on what you have accomplished. If you find yourself needing motivation or needing someone to be accountable to, the blogisphere is here to help you.
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